Clarify That You Are Mostly In Accordance Of Each Other’s Outlook In Life.
“In no particular order…
Sexual Preferences and Orientation: You must establish your sexual preferences before getting married. Your husband / wife’s satisfaction is a top importance to your relationship’s longevity. You can do group sex / go poly if you both agree on that or just lock-up yourselves in a tall tower never to be disturbed forever. No lies here. Be honest if you have a tendency to go gay / straight or whether you are open or totally not into it.
Outlook in Life: Clarify that you are mostly in accordance of each other’s outlook in life. Admit it, people can’t truly be neutral, and we all have biases based on how we are brought up and the environment we lived in. Major differences are possible red flags in marriage. Not saying it’s impossible but lesser risks means lesser arguments as you know what to expect and how to handle situations. This involves principles, culture and choice of lifestyle. You don’t want to have a racist partner who says he respects you but mocks your people. If you want kids and are open to having many, be cautious of a pro-choice partner. I mean, know before you dive at least so you can adjust your expectations.
Religion: I agree there is always a middle ground but when you have kids this can be complex. Freedom of religion is true, but since you will be living under one roof this is a challenge. You can’t be sensitive since you have to give space and you can’t be insensitive since this will involve your kids. Imagine Catholic+Wiccan or a Buddhist+Muslim. Think about crucifix, pentagram, fasting and other wives. Also, that religion extends to his/ her relatives who you will be meeting and spending holidays with.
Stability: Not much of a question if you are in for a life of hunting and gathering or a person with great survival skills. You don’t need a lot of money to be happy but at least you should have ENOUGH. If you are a thrifty person with reasonable expenses you would certainly hate it if your husband/wife spends a hundred dollars for a fancy meal that only covers merely a tenth of your hunger meter.
Leisure: You can’t just have sex whenever you’re bored. No. Don’t compete with rabbits. Take into consideration that you will mostly want to spend your time with each other and you can’t do totally different things when you’re together. One would not enjoy being a mere caddy while you’re golfing or a personal assistant while you are shopping. You have to share or be flexible to learn and enjoy each other’s hobbies.
Life Skills: Are you sure you want to marry someone who can’t even cook an egg? Can’t recognize mold on bread? Can’t pay bills? Can’t talk to customer service? Can’t run an errand? Is too gullible to strangers? Experience is the best teacher and there is always a first for everything… but if you want a longer life and to not die of food poisoning or some freak accident at least know half of the basics before thinking of getting married. Be wary of people who keep on giving excuses…at least try right?”